escape

have you ever just layed in bed with your window opened or sat outside without music on and just listenend to what was going on in the world around you?

seasons come and go but i would never change

you said you didnt know what to say
and i dont blame you, i wouldnt know what to either in that situation
but sometimes all you need to do to be there for someone is to sit there silently as you hold their hand

landslide

so much for going to sleep at 3....

one of the best texts i ever got was from someone i did and still do consider a friend but we weren't that close realistically.

it was a little over a year ago. he sent me a text saying things that i had already heard before, but it was because he wasnt obligated to msg me, that i knew it was sincere. for a few minutes in a long time i actually felt happy.

 if you know who you are, thanks. you really helped.

we'll take control ofr the world like its all that we have to hold on to

written in the stars, a million miles away

dont blink, they wont even miss you at all

 

lol

make you regret all the things you said to me

the movie "i spit on your grave"
wow.. talk about taking revenge

writtings on the walls

we're friends and i will always be here for you but if you're going to bitch that much, every single day about the exact same thing, than get rid of the problem. otherwise suck it up and get the fuck over it

and p.s,
i have a lot of patience but its wearing thin for you. why bother asking for my advice and my opinion if you don't even listen?

And the writings on the wall

The great moments of your life won't necessarily be the things you do. They'll also be the things that happen to you. Now, I'm not saying you can't take action to affect the outcome of your life. You have to take action. And you will! But never forget, that on any day, you could step out the front door, and your whole life could change forever. You see the Universe has a plan kids; and that plan is always in motion. A butterfly flaps its wings, and it starts to rain. It's a scary thought, but it's also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the machine constantly working... Making sure that you end up exactly where you're supposed to be.. exactly when you're supposed to be there. The right place. At the right time.

-himym

This song is every word I left unspoken

heres hoping for the best

how could such a good day end so badly?

this is ridiculous.
you really need a lot of help

please, just stop

Take a breath and rest your jaw

okay seriously?
one thing i hate is when you go back on what you said and turn it around to make me sound like the bad person, and that I'm "putting words in your mouth". fuck you

next, you have no reason to not trust me. I'm always honest, i have no reason not to be, and just because I'm not in the fucking hospital or dead does not mean i drink every other day and built up a bigger tolerance to alcohol than you. what do you want me to say? sorry i don't get drunk off a bottle of beer?

Also, i love how it takes me to get completely fucked out of my mind in order for you to act like a parent. I'm not saying i don't love the freedom you give me, and i know you care, but it is kind of sad sometimes when i see my friends get in shit for stuff that you wouldn't even care or seem to care about. maybe its their parents or maybe its you..but i think the answers obvious. and yes i know most parents wouldn't let their kids do half the shit you let me do, I'm not a fucking dumbass, so you really don't need to remind me all the time. and by the way, thanks for making me sound like a horrible kid to have, like I'm a problem child or something.

your also a fucking hypocrite. if there's one thing you cant get mad at me for, its the amount i drink, unless its everyday, and because I'm underage.
i come home drunk once. you on the other hand Ive seen drunk more times than i can count, and I'm the one you're worried about? I'm the one who might have a problem? what the fuck...

oh and way to make me seem like the mature one in the argument. i ask you not to do something, and instead you do it even more? seriously, how old are you?

and way to go, saying one day ill be alone and no one will be here to help me and get me the "medical attention" i need, as if i need medical attention all the time. That just makes me feel so loved, good to know I'm going to be alone one day. and also saying "one day you wont be here" no fucking shit, of course i know that! my dads dead so clearly I'm well aware that people don't live forever, but to use it against me when you are well aware that i hate when you say that? thanks bitch.

and how about you actually listen to me for once? or take what i say into consideration.
 you are a horrible person to argue with because you refuse to listen to anyone else's views or think maybe for a second that their right and your wrong.

some of the things you say piss me off so much and i cant even fight it because somehow you turn it around to make it sound like an insult, or judgmental, or that I'm "putting words in your mouth".

her: ill take your word for it but I'm just not convinced
me: you don't believe me?
her: i didn't say
me: you just did! the last time i drank was at Ian's wedding.
her: i don't know colleen... I'm just not convinced. I'm at work during the day, you go out late sometimes...
me: so you don't believe me?
her: stop putting words in my mouth!
me: oh my god!


i have never given u any reason to not trust me, so why the hell you think id lie is beyond me.
Just because some people in the family had alcohol problems, doesn't mean I'm going to. I'm not them. if theirs anyone that needs the help with the drinking its you.

I'm sorry i put you through a lot or whatever but you aren't exactly the easiest person to live with either. especially when you're drunk, blasting music at 3am, on a workday. and when i try and tell you shit you say when your like that or the fact that you should go to sleep, you laugh it off, tell me not to worry, or say oh shit that's scary, I'm so sorry. and do it again 3 nights later.
clearly your not sorry if you do it again. but whatever, your life and your liver your screwing up

oh and by the way, I'm a teenager, i can make stupid ass mistakes, its a given. do i do it all the time? no, do i learn from my mistakes? yes. you should know that, being my mom and all. do i regret drinking that much? obviously! i don't like not remembering and being sick, i don't need you telling me you hope i feel like shit and vomit a lot so that  i "learn my lesson".

you make it sound like i do it all the time. when was the last time i was drunk in front of you? never.so tell me what the fuck the problem is.


i hate fighting with you because there's no arguing with you. you always have to be right. and the things you say half the time are fucked. Just because you don't wanna admit that you're in the wrong doesn't give you the right to make me feel bad instead. I know you care, but how about next time you stop acting like a bitch, actually listen to me and "take your own words and actions into consideration."

 parents can seriously be really mean and stupid sometimes

the past should stay dead

fwb
yay or nay?...

i wont cry, it'll be fine

And all my friends don't give a fuck 
they'll tell me that it's just bad luck 

Where to go from here?

1) give me one good reason why i shouldn't worry.
 2) tell me how your trying to protect me by calling me to inform me of something that doesn't even surprise me anymore, which is sad.
3) if you were truly sorry you wouldn't do it again and again.

am i mad? yes
am i disappointed? yes

romance is dead

i never asked

diamonds arent forever

"haha fuck do i have to be honest again?"
-g

and you really wonder why i dont want to date you?