hellogoodbye

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6-KQ1tp_qOQ
makes me smile:)

Trigger

another day

another dream

Secure your place in hell

Day could never achieve this

i absolutely love the night

unless there's something to look forward to when i wake up, ill always hate that feeling of opening my eyes, only to see its so early the sun hasn't even come up yet, or is slowly creeping its way over the horizon
the stars amaze me
i know there simply balls of gas or whatever but there just so damn beautiful
i wish we could see them here, but no, they have to be covered up by all of the street lights and pollution
that dark blanket that's placed on earth once a day for a mere few hours
the dark is a terrifying prospect
things hiding in the shadows, waiting
everything gets 100x scarier
corners, hallways, closets, movies, bodies of water, forests, houses, barns, feilds, graveyards, streets, parks, noises..?
night time can cause imaginations to run wild
out of fear we create images and scenes that we normally wouldn't
not necessarily morbid, but unique to the person creating them
maybe that's what drives some people insane
fear
just some possibility, made by an ignorant, naive teenager

born in this world as it all falls apart

Watch the beauty of all our lies passing right before my eyes

I hear the hate in all your words.

all the wars to make us hurt

We get so sick of so sick,

we never wanted all this

Medication for the kids with no reason to live

So we March to the drums

of the dammed as we come

Watch it burn in the sun

we are numb

A Beautiful Discord

Now that it's here,
it's too late.
the whole wide world,
is fearing the wrong things.
falling down a cold staircase.
and persistently i darken my shadow to cover up regret but the train tracks still lie straight.
it'll be the end of deception.
vertical to the horizon.

Nervous Breakdown

All I ever do is wish things were different.

This envy is destroying me,

and it is obvious.
I'm looking to put a bullet into the tile floor.

Mark this.

I want to say something:

I kissed your lips you pulled my hair it was the craziest thing

way to perfect to be true

but i have the sudden urge to climb that mountain and jump off the top

Also to have a grass fight

like in elementary school

wake in a sweat again,another day's been laid to waste,in my disgrace

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tx1XIm6q4r4

i don't know why but i find this really funny

you held me in, i riped you out

Its hard to wake up,
when the shades have been pulled shut
This house is haunted,
its so pathetic,
it makes no sense at all
Im ripe with things to say,
the words rot and fall away
A stupid poem could fix this home,
I'd read it every day

i wish i could be him^

right where he is

wherever that happens to be

away from everything

no worries

no bullshit

no lies

no drama

peace

God of time, am I lost in your eyes?

My sleeping patterns have been fucked lately.
i go to sleep way to late. when i try going to sleep early it doesn't work out and i end up waking up more tired than i would have if i went to sleep later.
Also i wake up in the WORST positions.
either my neck is bent up on the pillow, half my body is off the bed, i did a total 180 and i wake up facing the end of my bed, if by any chance i have a pillow its one my head did not originaly fall on when i fell asleep, just to name a few.
regardless, i need a good night sleep.
its been weeks.
my neck is totaly fucked and im tired all the time.

new wish?
totaly lame: P

what's mine is yours and yours is mine so take me away

dedicated to monika;)

The Way I See It #21

People need to see that,far from being an

obstacle, the world's diversity of languages,

religions and traditions is a great treasure,

affording us precious opportunities to

recognize ourselves in others.

The Way I See It #26

Failures hard, but success is far more

dangerous. If you're successful at the

wrong thing, the mix of praise

and money and opportunity can lock

____ in forever.

Just don’t trust these liars at the door

we watch as time passes by

complain but never do anything

On the religion retreat back in like October,we went to an Islamic centre. The guy in charge told us that the women wear what they wear as a sign of respect towards themselves. To show that women are not less then men or just as equal as men but more. I saw his point, but i still don't get it. Yeah, i guess what they wear is probably more respectful to themselves then some of the slutty stuff we wear, but its been taken to an extreme. some fathers will not let their daughters wear anything less than the floor length dresses and head scarfs.

Reason?

Some say "Its your religion", but is that actually true? Shouldn't they be able to wear whatever they want? I would feel so confined, set apart from the world. Then you have the women's rights activists. They're good for a laugh. They take the equality thing to an extra level. One that's trying to make women more powerful than men. Apparently we cant live in a world where one sex is trying to be more than the other. Or even h a t e anyone of the opposite sex.

Example?

Montreal Massacre
Society has come a long way, but it is true, there are still a lot of sexist people out there.
Along with tons of racists, discriminatory bastards.
This is stupid. Ridiculous.

I'm on the verge of a breakdown

Nigahiga x2:)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=goix7jFXD9Q&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JdLCEwEFCMU&feature=channel_page

lets flip a coin

heads, im yours
tails, your mine
-random picture
<3

The silence ringing through my ears, and all I want to do is hear your voice

Tighten your lips so the secrets your hiding are never released

at leats i found out what i wanted to know but
i wish i could ask you straight out whats going on

and as the sunlight burns the sky

A realization in the making...

Dying is your latest fashion

Hurtful words

From my enemies of the last five years

What's it like to die alone?

How does it feel when tears freeze

When you cry?

The blood in your veins is twenty below

Sitting in this room playing Russian roulette

Finger on the trigger to my dear Juliet

Out from the window see her back drop silhouette

This blood on my hands is something I cannot forget

Take this all the way,I'm suffocating, tell me what the fuck is wrong with me

Not a shred of evidence exists in favour of the idea that life is serious.

-Brendan Gill

Life is something that happens when you cant get to sleep.

-Fran Lebowitz

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

-R.D.Laing

harder better faster stronger

weekend was amazing:)
chilled with people everyday
hate being back at school
it does not feel like a teusday
family day;
itsnt it sad that society cant even wait between christmas break and march break for extra day(s) off?
not complaining though

by the way
i cant belive we havnt gotten one decent snow day

cant wait for saturday
toronto with monika&patti(L)

im holding onto a fairy tale

who made up the wish?

there has to be someone out there, thousands of years ago who decided that the best way to make something come true without any effort is to wish

think about it,

wishing is simply laziness for those who dont actualy want to have to do work

i wonder if any wishes ever come true becasue you made that wish or it's simply coincidence

wishing is like God

it gives us something to believe in

lets face it,

people cant survive without having some higher power to turn to

by the way

its 11:11

MAKE A WISH!

we're crashing into the ground as all fall from grace

i miss you
i wish i could just know the truth
why dont i ever see you anymore?
do either of you even realise how important you are to me?
you taught me things others where to scared to say
you were one of the few i could open up to and trust that you would never breathe a word i said
and you kept him in line
you could watch him when i couldnt;you made sure he didnt do something stupid
i miss you
can someone please just tell me the truth for once?
im tired of all these bullshit lies you make up
do you honestly think im that stupid?
do you really think ill just forget about her?

mindless self indulgence

it's 11:23
I'm bored
i want to sleep
my eyes don't seem to want to close
anyone got some tape?
or better yet a stapler?
so staying up past 12 everyday cant be healthy, when you have to get up at 630 that day
i promise myself that Monday i will go to sleep at 11
i need to find a job..
I'm not looking forward to march
i don't know why but for some reason i just started thinking about jackass
i love bam:)
they should make another movie
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zRpxJEhBRBs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BO1G0JPauKM&feature=related
in honour of jackass^
movies
i want to see the nightmare before Christmas
top 3 movies:(no actual order)
the devil wears prada,silent hill, pans labyrinth
im working on top 5, i cant remember the other 2
isn't it weird that you'll be listening to a song, then something distracts you and you don't even realise that like 7 songs have gone by and u didn't even notice?
its now 11:35
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5a39fS-82HE
i actually cried from laughter first time i saw this

11:50

fuck i need to sleep
weekend should be good:)
sooo psyched for next weekend!!
i love this picture-------------------------->
its very green
12:00

tell me something sweet to get me by

a kiss is a lovely trick

designed by nature

to stop speech

when words become superfluous

-?

and I won't say one single thing till we get this right

ive figured something out that i didnt think was true
how long has it been going on?
how much do you think you know?
how much are you right about?
i guess im happy.. but im extremly worried what you think or have thought

Sweat baby sweat

This is how much i love you

Ill jump out of a hot tub of 103 degrees

only to lay down in 5 iches of snow

wearing nothing else but a bikini

in the middle of the night

at a temperature of -10

(more than once)

then have to wait for a picture to be taken

i have to say,

you deffinitly make my life more interesting

fee fi fo fum, hey where u frum, i like ur bum

so i have a confession
one of my best friends is my lover
once a month we travel up north where all the mountains and waterfalls are becasue our love has to be a secret
she is my soul mate

this is dedicated to christina Dilella.. you messed up little ho<3
i love you:)

ps. this is obviously a joke

if there's a bright side to this suffering can you help me see? its getting harder to believe

so who started this whole 11 11 wishing thing?
i rememeber reading it in a book in grade 9 for english
romiette and julio-a remake, modernised version of romeo and juliette
since then the whole 11 11, 1 11, 1234, 222(and w/e else) craze has started
and there rules now to?
if u see it change to 11 12 it doesnt count, you cant watch the clock to wait for it to turn to 11 11, 11 11 pm doesnt count becuase of military time...
why dont things just stay simple?
life would be so much easier
btw.. i think one of my wishes came true.. but not the way i tought it would
but ill take wat i can get
how sad is that?:P

Sixth of June

just feels like i can relate

Face down,ass up, thats the way i like to fuck

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fbGkxcY7YFU
LOL LOL LOL
iuno wtf this is..seriously.. but its funny:p

-thanks to lukas for showing me this:)

So heres to a better year

so i wrote this in a note on facebook and i figured id put it here as well:)

1. this is my first note
2. my favourite color is red
3.i love my friends and family
4. scared to death of the future
5. when i graduate highschool i want to travel for a year
6. im scared of spiders
7. im obsessed with horror movies
8. when i grow up i wanna be an actress or archeologist:P
9. i really need a job
10. i get bored way to easily
11. i get ditracted way to easily
12.i love every single typ of music
13. im going to new york in april!!!
14.i love to cook
15.i love writing quotes in my agenda and making countdowns to end of class on peoples papers:)16. i want 3 kids
17.i love chocolate
18.i cant sleep with my door open
19. im an only child and i really wish i had sibling to relate to
20. my goal at the moment is to land a jump boarding
21. i am really shy
22. i want to move to bc, preferably whistler
23. i am scared of the dark :P
24. i make a wish at 11 11
25. i use to have an afro in grade 5:P

Love games

Had a great talk with you tonight and its made me feel so much better.
Even though i know it doesnt mean anything, im glad that we talked cuz its felt like its been so long since we actually did.
I hope it stays this way, and i hope that theres no more long ass time periods that go by where we dont talk.
Youre one of my bffls<3
ifly:)
Also,she has no idea how lucky she actually is...

The city looks so pretty do you wanna burn it with me?

fuck..
why?
fuck
fuck
fuck
i really wish that no one had said that it wont work out,as if the possibility of it working out isnt even an option
i lost my chance(if i even had one) and that sucks
hopefully this will help me get over you though.
i hope to god that it will cuz im tired of liking you.

This is life as we know it

saturday=fucking awsome
hung out with christina most of the day
we went to mall to do some last minute shopping
but guess apparently doesnt hire younger than 18
damn:(
angelas suprise party in the evening:)
went to Axia then Mcdonalds
good times:)

p.s
Happy belated birthday Angela!!!
i love you:):):)<3

Ashes of the wake

so today my mom was like
"i was thinkging, next year when you turn 18 and i turn 50, we get tattoos together. maybe matching. but symbolic"somehting else
but i was like woooooahhhhh wtf?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
i mena its fucking great shes cool with tattoos and obv i want a tattoo, of course:) but im not thrilled bout the whole matching deal.. and i have the other thing called dad i have to convince
cuz if he wasnt happy about my nose peircing he'll probably despise the idea of a tattoo
w/ezzzzzz:)
im probably gona get a tattoo bitchesssss!!!!
(in a year)

A moment suspended in time

I think i have an addiction to starbursts

:)

Paradise lost

Nightmare

Helll
Tears

Hearts
Pain

Love

Worthlessness
School

Friends

Family
Purpose

Emotional

Hurt
Hatred

Anger
Lies

Uncontrolable

Alone

Life

Dead in Ditches

i dont know why but every time i go i get this nervous feeling in my stomach

it feels like a thousand little butterflies

but why? shouldnt i be use to this?

and to add onto that theres another one...

how am i going to deal with seeing them both during the week?

and the possibility of "help" seems to unbelievable to be real

i would give anything just for it to work, to feel different, to feel better.

not to mention what my friend told me earlier; ouch. that really hurts. of course you didnt know. how could you? you probably figured i was over it. not quite. i honestly,truly, sincerely wish i was. my life would be so much easier. im happy for you but i cant believe i even thought for a moment i had a shot. this is stupid. nothing happend so theres no reason for it to hurt right?

i wish everything could all just go away

Lose yourself

Look, if you had one shot, or one opportunity To seize everything you ever wanted-One moment Would you capture it or just let it slip?...
You better lose yourself in the music, the moment You own it, you better never let it go You only get one shot, do not miss your chance to blow This opportunity comes once in a lifetime yo...

hot and cold

friday went to anushkas place with patti for anushkas bday party
made a shityy ass cake and went in the hot tub, its fucking cold wen ur standing knee deep in snow in only a bikini and towel trying to brush a foot of snow off the cover
good times:)
then we watched the exorsism of emily rose, not bad but i fell asleep halfway through

yeahh.. exciting weekend-minus friday-

*note sarcasim

All downhill from here

so the steelers won:(
congrats on 6 superbowls but fuck, cmon arizona!!